( sharing my recent blog post from my other site )

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This time of year, the PUSH-PUSH-PUSH to BUY NOW! reaches its fever peak. I stopped into a local makeup/skincare store the day after Thanksgiving (I worked that day and needed to pick something up at lunch) and was overwhelmed with the “in your face” holiday atmosphere. I was still essentially digesting my Thanksgiving food from less than 24-hours ago as I walked into a red, green and glittered assault of my senses. There were Christmas carols blaring over the loudspeaker, tinsel garland draped EVERYWHERE, and out of the stockroom came loads of cheap items, bedecked in red and green – all ready to give.

I couldn’t wait to get out of that store and away from the hordes of people clawing at cheaply-made junk that were poorly disguised as holiday gifts.

From a logical perspective, I do understand that retail businesses feel the need to close each year on strong footing, and so have traditionally looked to the looser spending habits that result closer to the Christmas season. Still, the fake and forced frenzy to SHOP and BUY and SPEND ruined the holidays for me many years ago.

I did some quick searching on the financial foundations for all the red and green glitter that is being sprayed over every item in just about every store, and found the following:

• November and December can account for 20–40% of a business’ annual sales
• The holiday spending frenzy helps clear out inventory and generate cash flow before year-end, which is critical for retailers with tight liquidity (not a lot of available cash)
• Smaller retailers and those in discretionary categories often rely on holiday sales to stay solvent. A weak season can lead to layoffs or even closures.
• Larger chains and eCommerce giants typically use the season to boost profits beyond baseline expectations, planning months ahead to maximize this window.
• The holiday season (Nov–Dec) accounted for 19% (on average) of total annual U.S. retail sales over the last five years.
• Retailers that sell toys, electronics, and apparel look to glean as much as 25% – 30% of their yearly revenue during this season.

Was it ALWAYS this way?

I’m old enough to have several grandchildren, and as far back as I can remember, this time of year meant folding over corners in the Sears Catalog – holiday edition. For some context, let’s look at the history of holiday shopping trends in the U.S.

A brief review shows that retailers recognized the holidays to be a profit engine as early as the mid-19th century. The full-scale commercialization “went viral” in the 20th century as department stores, advertising icons, and later, digital marketing became standard tools to drive more spending and sales.

Retailers began to see the holiday season as a gold mine.

A History of Holiday Shopping

• 1820s–1840s: Early Commercialization
• 1820s: First newspaper ads promoting Christmas gifts appear.
• 1840s: Santa Claus begins appearing in product advertisements.
• 1867: Extended Store Hours
  • Macy’s stays open until midnight on Christmas Eve—an early sign of holiday demand.
• 1924: Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade
  • Marks the start of using Thanksgiving as the kickoff for holiday shopping.
• 1930s: Iconic Holiday Marketing
  • Coca-Cola popularizes Santa imagery in ads.
• 1939: Montgomery Ward creates Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer as a marketing tool.
  • I had NO idea that this was the “birthplace” of Rudolph!!!!
• 1940s–1950s: Post-War Boom
  • Department stores and malls thrive; Christmas shopping becomes a cultural norm.
• 1960s–1970s: Black Friday Emerges
  • Retailers embrace the term “Black Friday” as the official start of the holiday shopping season.
    • with the word “black” referring to moving their books from being “in the red” (reflecting a negative $ balance) to “in the black“.
• 2005: Cyber Monday
  • Online retailers launch Cyber Monday, extending holiday shopping into the digital space.
• 2015: Amazon Prime Day
  • Creates another major shopping event, further expanding the holiday sales window.

I don’t easily fall into conspiratorial thinking, but taking this long look backward, it sure seems that we’ve all been very intentional TARGETS for people wanting to separate us from our money.

I believe that it began innocently enough with business owners wanting to expand their work and provide for their families. Three examples of this are Nordstrom’s, Macy’s and Walmart.

Retail Pioneers

John W. Nordstrom was born in Sweden in 1871, and immigrated to the U.S. at age 16 with $5 in his pocket. He worked in mines and logging camps before joining the Klondike Gold Rush in 1897. After striking gold and selling his claim for $13,000, he returned to Seattle seeking a business opportunity. He used his gold rush earnings to co-found the first Nordstrom store in 1901 with Carl F. Wallin, a Seattle shoemaker (they met during the Alaska gold rush). Wallin offered John a partnership in a shoe store, and they opened Wallin & Nordstrom at Fourth and Pike in Seattle in 1901.

Rowland Hussey Macy (1858) was born in Massachusetts to a modest family. He initially worked as a whaler and then later as a dry goods clerk before starting his own store. He did not come from wealth, rather his success came from persistence and innovation in retail.

Sam Walton (1962) grew up in a farming family during the Great Depression. They were not wealthy and Sam worked various jobs to pay for college and started his first store with a bank loan.

Today we have Nordstrom’s at one end of the socioeconomic spectrum, Walmart at the other and Macy’s somewhere in between.

What happened?

There is, of course, a long and academic explanation of this, but it boils down to this: retailers got really good at creating the illusion of scarcity (limited-time deals), using emotional triggers, and making the act of buying extremely convenient in order to maximize their profits – especially the Q4 profits. Cultural norms reinforced the idea that generosity equals spending, making holiday shopping both a tradition and a business imperative.

Emotional Triggers

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Fear (of missing out) & Urgency (FOMO)

• How it works: Fear of missing out creates a sense of urgency. Limited-time offers, countdown timers, and “Only 3 left in stock!” messages push customers to act quickly.
• Why it works: People are wired to avoid loss, so scarcity and time pressure make them prioritize immediate action.

Belonging & Community

• How it works: Brands build a sense of identity and inclusion; think loyalty programs, exclusive clubs, or campaigns like Nike’s “You’re not alone.”
• Why it works: Humans crave connection. Feeling part of a group or movement makes customers more loyal and emotionally invested.

Nostalgia

• How it works: Retailers evoke fond memories by reintroducing retro designs, old logos, or classic products.
• Why it works: Nostalgia taps into positive emotions tied to the past, creating comfort and trust that influence purchase decisions.

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Here’s some insight into how they execute on those strategies:

Emotional Marketing

• Trigger: Tie gift-buying to love, family, and joy.
• Example: Coca-Cola’s Santa ads (1930s) – made Santa iconic and linked Coke to holiday cheer.

Scarcity & Urgency

• Trigger: Limited-time deals create fear of missing out.
• Example: Amazon Lightning Deals – countdown timers during Cyber Monday.

Social Proof

• Trigger: Show popularity to drive demand.
• Example: Starbucks Holiday Cups – seasonal designs spark social sharing and “must-have” culture.

Tradition & Ritual

• Trigger: Make shopping part of holiday traditions.
• Example: Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade – event signals the start of holiday shopping.

Convenience & Accessibility

• Trigger: Remove friction for buyers.
• Example: Target’s Drive-Up Pickup – promoted as stress-free holiday shopping.

Status & Exclusivity

• Trigger: Premium or limited editions for prestige.
• Example: Apple Holiday Campaigns – position products as aspirational gifts.

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How many of these inspire you to ACT NOW! and start your own personal shopping frenzy?

Over the past couple of years, I have worked to pause in the moment when I feel one of these triggers, and pivot to a different place by asking a question.

A Peaceful Pivot (some tools)

Linking gift-buying to love, family, and joy: pivot your focus on being present, not giving presents.

• how can I be MORE PRESENT in this person’s life in a meaningful way?

Creating limited-time deals to generate the fear of missing out: remind yourself that if a business created some items, they’re certainly going to have the ability to make more.

• how can I pivot from BEING manipulated to spend according to someone else’s agenda, and take charge of deciding what and when to buy?
  • I will experiment with sitting with that feeling of urgency but not acting on it, and then journal about the outcome. My guess is that my life won’t be ruined by passing on that “limited time deal“.

Showing popularity to drive demand: this is straight-up middle school antics.

• I remind myself that I left middle school/mean-girl tactics decades ago, and that I have nothing to prove to anyone by buying anything.
  • most of us learned a long time ago that “everyone is doing it!” is a TERRIBLE reason to engage in anything.

Making shopping part of holiday traditions: this was intentional and manipulative, in my opinion, and never about ANYTHING other than separating us from more of our money.

• I can enjoy some of the standard holiday traditions without falling prey to marketing pressures and false beliefs in scarcity and lack.
  • I will make a list of holiday-themed things I can do with my family and friends that do not involve SHOPPING and where feasible, requires little, if any, money to be spent.

Removing friction for buyers: I have LONG believed that when we went from a cash-centric society to one that used cards, and now tapping of our phones, we lost a sense of how much money was flying out of our bank accounts.

• I practice MINDFUL shopping, whether in the stores, online or on an app.
  • I read and remind myself about the role of dopamine in my shopping urges, and I practice the pause whenever I get the urge to shop.

Featuring premium or limited editions for prestige: similar to the threat of “scarcity“, these marketed goods aren’t rare. They are manufactured at typical scale, but limited in quantity or time. The exclusivity is psychological, not physical.

• I will practice present-moment awareness, reminding myself that if something was made in a factory out of ordinary materials, it isn’t exclusive OR scarce.
  • I will remember that the reason I buy things is primarily for FUNCTION, not logo, and then shop accordingly.
    • See: “Luxury Without the Logo? How China is Disrupting the Designer Game with Factory-Direct Fashion“

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This year is different

Right before Thanksgiving, I entered a drawing at the local Michael’s Craft Store. The winner would take home a cashmere pencil style Xmas tree. I haven’t put a tree up in more than 10 years, and have been in a sort of humbug state of mind about all the insanity around the holiday.

(I was with my sister and she encouraged me to enter the drawing – not sure I would have done so if she wasn’t with me)

About a week after I entered the drawing, I got a call from Michaels that I had won their first tree drawing. I picked it up and thought a lot over the next few weeks about whether or not I would actually put up a tree. The weekend after Thanksgiving, I went to the basement and pulled out all my old ornaments and decorations to see if it was even feasible.

I ended up with a nicely decorated tree that is actually the PERFECT size and fit for my home. I don’t entertain in my home, as others in my family have much bigger places and options so this was for me, only. It felt like my grandmother had a hand in all this, as when we were growing up, her house was THE hub at Christmas. As I hung old ornaments from my childhood, and later years, I could almost feel her presence. I’ve written before about my belief that the divine interventions we get are more likely the spirits of those who loved us when they were on this earth, and still do.

• NOTE: the crocheted ornaments on the tree were all made by my grandmother. I found 1 knitted mitten (hung at the back) and some other “crafty” ornaments I had made over the years, but all the crocheted ones were made by my grandmother, who has been gone for more than 25 years.

If I had held onto any doubts about how I ended up with this tree or had the heart to put it up and decorate it, those evaporated as I admired my little Xmas corner and the random classical holiday music on my Echo device began to play “Silver Bells“. My grandmother was an organist, and she played this song (chime voicing on!) every Xmas Eve after we had opened all our presents.

It feels as though my grandmother said “enough is enough!” this year and took drastic action to get me to put up a tree – for no other reason than for me to reconnect with the GOOD things about the holiday season, and have a small refuge from all the retail spending insanity.

I will get a few gifts here and there this season as usual, but the BIGGEST gift of all this year is the restoration of my ability to rekindle some of the holiday magic I experienced as a child. There’s no store that can sell this; no amount of money will ever be able to buy it. It came, as do all holiday tradition stories, passed down in simplicity and love.

I wish everyone a heart-centered, FIBER-ARTS filled, and peaceful holiday season, this year and always.

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(C) 2025 Fiber Harmony/Stitch ‘n Dish